One reader emailed me about wedding ring and later said how lucky I am. I am not sure what she means by ‘lucky’; maybe because of pursuing my PhD because she did pray the best for my study.
I am thankful. I feel blessed. But..i’m ashamed with myself.
I’m not good enough. Indeed, I always wonder why I’m on this path. Why on earth I choose to be in life science field. I still remember, when I was in primary school I wanted to be a stewardess. I want to travel all around the world, wear a nice kebaya and walk steadily like a model. But, when people asked what I want to be, I would answer that I want to be doctor. Haha. Typical answer. In secondary school, I realized that I never wanted to be a doctor. I hate science subjects. Be it chemistry, physics, biology..i never get A’s in each tests. I want to be a businesswoman. I want to set up my own business, have few workers and I can monitor them from home. I want to be good wife, a successful housewife. *sigh.
I can see myself not an ambitious person. I just love to pamper myself, doing things that I want, that I love.
I never plan to enroll PhD as soon as this. This is all the chances given by my lovely supervisor, the path that He set for me.
Me?
Keep complaining.
Sigh.
And mummy keeps reminding me to be thankful to Allah. To thanks him for this wonderful journey He wrote for me. On how I can't be a stewardess but still able to travel a lot under uni scholar. On how I still live with parents. On how I met with wonderful guy to protect me. On everything..
T_T
Am I dont know how to be grateful?
T_T
